I have been reflecting on 2019 and how it set me up for this year.
2019 was wonderful, and at times really difficult. Before 2019 I was not a goal-setter; I had this sense that setting goals was an exercise in futility because there is so much we can’t control that can derail those goals. I thought it was better to just roll with the punches, go with the flow, fly by the seat of your pants…
Then something happened that made me question so many things, including how I thought about myself and what I wanted from life. I realised that rolling with the punches had not made me as adaptable and resilient as I thought, and taking life as it comes had not made me as happy as I have the potential to be.
I did a lot of work and soul searching to get to know myself better, and figure out what I want, and I started to set myself goals. A funny thing happened: I was able to establish more positive thought patterns, I became more motivated to do life, I am happier, and I feel stronger. Naturally, there is still a whole lot of stuff that I can’t control, and I need to remain open to changing my plans and goals when they are disrupted, but that is not a reason not to have goals and plans.
Then this happened
2020 came along and it was the first year I ever recall having my whole year mapped out. I said as much in January, thinking it was quite remarkable.
These were the highlights of my year to be:
- April: travel to Kyoto for team meetup
- May: travel to Vienna for department meetup
- June-August: 3 months leave from work, not planned in detail, but starting in Europe, doing some stuff at home, then ending in Japan
- August: travel to Okinawa, Tokyo, and Kyoto with husband for karate and sightseeing
- September: travel to Orlando, Florida for company meetup
Throughout the year I also wanted to grade twice in karate, and work on building my coding/developer skills.
As coronavirus spread those travel plans got knocked off the list. I still have leave from work, but there won’t be any travel, or the group activities I was hoping to do.
Don’t get me wrong. This is not a post of woe. I feel very lucky that I managed to squeeze in one of those two karate gradings before classes were cancelled. I’m also lucky to have attended one of the last conferences that happened in Sydney this year (ReactConf AU). Plus, of all the places to have to stay put, my house, with my husband, my rabbits, and all my craft supplies is a fantastic place to be!
I just wanted to acknowledge what I had hoped for this year; things that are now delayed or abandoned. I also don’t know what to strive for now…
Working toward black belt is still a goal, but the time frame is very uncertain now. For now, I will not give up training in whatever capacity I can at home.
I have been planning to do a bunch of work in the garden for about two years, never finding time to do it. Now I have the time and the inclination, and getting out in the garden has been good!
I can keeping developing my coding skills (yay internet!).
I have been doing something creative every day, and I think I will continue to do that, even after the #creative14 two-week challenge is complete.
Is that enough? In some ways it feels like we are all waiting for life to resume, but this could be life for a while. I want to live my life, not wait for it, I’m just not quite sure what that means right now.